Sin Sod in Udon

[tongoy]

Can't see where he says he done this before...

And what a good place to get opinions of strangers with years of experiance, why is it 'bull' asking this sort of stuff, i reckon a lot of men in the past would of got something out of a forum like this on certain matters..., couldn't of asked in a better place imo...and opinions are what they all are.

Thank you! I don't know where he has got this from. I haven't done it before.

I really appreciate all the replies I got. It has open my eyes and I'm very thankful to everybody who answered my post here. I think it is the sense of every forum to get answers to any questions or problems. If we would do all "our business" alone, for what we would need a forum like this then?

[poolshark]

don't have the village wedding yet?.
do the amphur wedding, bring her to germany and let her work, and save the sinsod from her wages.
then, when she has 34,000 euro in the bank, tell her to send it to her dad.

i bet she wont.... so why should you.

i married in nongkhai 3 years ago, paid 200,000 baht sinsot, and her mum,
paid for the food.
my lady was never married and 22 years old with a degree from her education.

don't be short sighted . if she truly loves you, money wont matter that much.

[wazza]

Bail out bail out bail out now

U are the villlage ATM , sorry

[Laan Yaa Mo]

If you are marrying Tata Young, Da Endorphine or Punch (Me' is mine!), you got a bargain at one million baht. However, if it is anyone else, it might be prudent to ask the family to re-consider the sin sodt and reduce it to 100,000-200,000 baht, which is chok dee for them since she has been married before.

In the end, however, it is up to you and what you think is the best for your happiness and peace of mind, and the future of you both.

[woody]

hey my post was the funniest

[Laan Yaa Mo]

"was" Woody "was"

It is really difficult to know how to answer these types of threads since we are so far removed from the lives of the people involved. Yet, in this case, the sin sodt requested seems so over the top that one feels fairly safe in issuing a note of caution.

[BKKSTAN]

I have often entertained the thought that the higher the sin sod demanded is a direct corelation to how great the contempt is for the falang!

After all,if you were a Thai,there would be no expectation of sin sod in this case.

So the question should be,why are they asking you to pay,when they would not ask the same of a Thai?

Are you less worthy or of such low class that you must show enough wealth to be considered?

[Laan Yaa Mo]

BKKSTAN, your sentiments and analysis seem correct.

However, since many farangs have paid these outrageous sin sodt sums in the past, the Thai girl may now feel that this is her due if she is going to marry a farang. She probably understands only a very few Thai men would give her anything unless he is particulary rich and she is particulary desirable from an economic and physical standpoint. Or, perhaps, she was an old flame and the fire has never burnt out completely.

In any case, there are many instances of farang men giving sin sodt to a previously married Thai women who may or many not have a child. Thus, it is quite understandable that a Thai lady expects sin sodt from a marriage with a farang.

Tradition and culture have changed because so many foreign men have given sin sodt in the past.

We can understand that, but it does not mean we have to follow this new path (tradition, custom) created by other foreign men.

This lady seems to have gone beyond the pale by the amount of money sought by her family.

[Irish Alan]

I believe I said it the last time this topic came up but here goes again by way of example how some Thais take the pi55... I know a Thai female getting married soon, third marriage, second time to a fahlang. The original Thai husband paid a million (so she says) husband number 2 paid 1 million and the criteria that she sets out for prospective husbands (3 seems to border on small business) dictates that he will pay 1 million . He wanted to go to Bangkok for a small registry office wedding, she wont hear of it, she has a big family and wants a big wedding. She has a kid too from first client I mean husband.

As Tina sang, "What's love got to do with it?"

[aznyron]

my second reply to this post like I said in my first one it up to you I make no judgements on those who do & don't pay but as I read these poster they are all pretty much advising you to beware of this lady
now I will give you my personal feeling as for paying sin sod I am old man and I can get a lady in less than 5 minutes to live with me and pay her not more than a 1000 baht a week and she will be happy
so why in the hell would I give some lady I only know a short time 1 million baht = 30.000 USD
especially when she has been around the block previously married with children on another note I will not give money to the family especially when they are much younger than I you want to do some thing nice feed them don't pay them big difference I am not paying some one bar bill or cigarette habit or sex bill in the local brothel and that what will happen with your sin sod money they will be broke in a month and looking for more. Now I want to say I did not pay sin sod my wife's parents are deceased and if they were alive I still would not pay as for customs I have my own set of customs which I live by not some one else
so if you want my advice listen to WAZZA

[747man]

Tongtoy, IS She a Super-Duper Lay or Something,You seem to have MONEY to chuck away,Remember the saying " A Fool & His Money are SOON Parted " Tell her Father straight to mind his own business !! Good God man his daughter is 2nd hand,USED GOODS !!! As BM says PLENTY MORE FISH IN THE SEA !!!Give the Old Man...........This... Keep an eye on the ATM......Best of luck,Mate...

[dougness]

Iam not the best person to get advice from,but 1.5 million baht is unbelievable.My brother in law (thai)has only been asked 150,000 to 200,000baht for a Thai girl finishing college with no baggage from a respectable family.Maybe that goes to show you how we farangs are getting hosed.If you have 200,000baht that you won't miss,but 1.5 million is ridiculous.

[Techland]

Hallo Udo,

auch mir stellt sich die Frage, was an dieser Frau so besonderes ist, dass Du auch nur daran denkst diesen Unsinn seitens der Famiie mitzumachen. Wenn Sie tatsächlich bisher abgeschirmt vom Rest der Welt (Farangs und alles was dazu gehört) lebte, frage ich mich allerdings auch, ob das eine gesunde Basis für eine langfristige Beziehung sein kann. IMHO nein. Die Unterschiede werden im täglichen Leben zu gross sein. Und erst mal hier wirst Du auch andere Frauen kennenlernen...

Ansonsten viel Erfolg. Und die Jungs (alten Männer) hier haben Recht.

[BKKSTAN]

Some guys spend 25M on houses and pay out all kinds of money,so I will put my ''pimp'' deal out there for my daughter:10 M sinsod,6 M house and I promise to give the SS back in my daughters name! Oh yeah,the groom has to be young and very handsome!

[lepidoptra]

I think we should hold a vote on the Forum. DEAL or NO DEAL.
I would think there would be a huge majority for NO DEAL.
The question is would Udo abide by the results. I have my doubts?

[Irish Alan]

Hallo Udo,

auch mir stellt sich die Frage, was an dieser Frau so besonderes ist, dass Du auch nur daran denkst diesen Unsinn seitens der Famiie mitzumachen. Wenn Sie tatsächlich bisher abgeschirmt vom Rest der Welt (Farangs und alles was dazu gehört) lebte, frage ich mich allerdings auch, ob das eine gesunde Basis für eine langfristige Beziehung sein kann. IMHO nein. Die Unterschiede werden im täglichen Leben zu gross sein. Und erst mal hier wirst Du auch andere Frauen kennenlernen... Ansonsten viel Erfolg. Und die Jungs (alten Männer) hier haben Recht.

Ich verstehe nicht, können Sie schreiben in Englisch bitte.

Danke schon.

[beer monkey]

We are not all old men Danke...!!


And having just read the op again...it brings a little chuckle to me....more in disbelief, what are these Thais thinking..!!!! we would maybe react differantly if we was faced with the situation in cold blood so to speak but sitting in front of my screen i am saying tell them to get lost "the brass neck of some people".. they need knocking down a peg or two... "The Land Of Smiles".. :-" ...but all this is easy to say for us....you may really wish to marry this girl and be head over heels in love....you sound like a good guy and i reckon the world is your lobster.(so to speak)...go forth young gun...'Love will conquer all' or so someone once said.
Anyway Sound her out see what happens and play your cards right....and do let us know the outcome i am sure we all want to know, Chok Dee.
And some real good posts on this one

[BKKSTAN]

My wife of 9 years is laughing!She said you guys blame the Thai for being greedy,but you the one that come play Hi-So! Now you are going to be a ''cheap charley''?

Maybe the girl and family think you think less of her now or at least they have that for an excuse during ''negotiations''!

[beer monkey]

"Cheap Charley"..lol..i don't consider the amount offered to be classed as a CC and coupled with all the other amounts of spending our man has done......the term cheap charley grinds with me a bit, now if you go out and have a spend up on restaurants/bars/beer anything and you don't leave a big tip or you choose not to pay the price of something or you barter someone down on goods, you don't buy someone a drink...you don't pay the going rate etc and the term Cheap Charley gets mention..that gets up my nose a little,how easy they forget about the amounts you already spent..!!!
I guess we would get the blame for the greediness.. ...maybe it is down to the westerner coming to Thailand with too mutt money...so when the girl returning back home to the village with gold and nice clothes with a purse full of baht....she buys a washing machine she buys a TV she buys a Motorbike, she wants a truck she wants a new house....everyone sees....everyone wants..its a vicious circle..Ohh sh!te we created a monster...!!!

And wonder who made that term up and how long ago...thai or farang...?? i have an idea that it may have been back in the days of R+R but can't be certain.

[wazza]

Once I hear the CC term used in front of me or directed at me , I change my name to "Check Bin Wazza " and leave without any tip at all. I despise it.

Yes some people have made the Expat a big spender in Thai terms, that doesnt mean it applies to all of us.