A Christmas Present fit for a Farang?

[Naam Jai]

Driving along this morning I wanted to turn right. There was a double white line and traffic in both direction on a single lane road. I pulled to the middle of the road having previously indicated in good time letting the on coming traffic pass before turning. Two cars travelling in the same direction as me overtook me while other cars passed on the near side. Those on the offside had to cross the double white line to the distress of the oncoming traffic. It was like a Formula one race with cars trying to overtake each other and I felt like a marooned island and was lucky not have hit the third one, to overtake on the offside, as I set off to cross when the coast was clear or so I thought so.

I know that Thai drivers are completely oblivious to anything else on the road ,so does anyone know where I can purchase those knives that protude and retract out from the wheel hubs of James Bonds car and rip the passings cars tyres to shreds or the laser that cut that Lada body off. Got to be the Farangs Thailand Christmas present of the year.

Or do you have a better or more sinister idea?