cumbria wrote:Hi Chaps,
its been a while since I posted but I have been rather pleasurably busy. I will explain. My wife died in labour on 31/7/08. My son died a day later. I was heartbroken as I loved my wife so much that unless you feel the same it would be useless to try and explain how I felt....
Anyway, in Nov 2010 my wifes best friend from Thailand (half Thai, half Norwegian) and from the south made contact with me saying she had left her husband months ago and wanted to start a relationship. This I felt was someone I could trust-I have a son and have to think of him first. Anyway the girl comes to the UK-she has a Brit passport and all was fine for about well 1 week. I am so shocked (stupid?) in fact this girl (extremely good looking) has never actually told me the truth about anything! I have never experienced such a compulsive liar in my life!
Obviously her husband knew nothing of her visit! I am astonished and feel so let down at her deception, this has really shook my faith in-well anyone! I have read all the stories about suckers in the past but bloody hell...
I knew my wife so well, she never told me a lie, we shared hardships together, she told me when her family had asked her for money...I find it so hard to comprehend that her friend (they met in the UK) could be such a lying bastard!
Sorry to bend your ears but this is a real kick in the nuts for me which I could have done without...I suppose Im no different than all the other suckers that I read about!
Hey first off, I'm sorry about your wife! I understand because I lost my wife to cancer and understand the loss. This was my reason for going and living in Thailand to try and keep my mind occupied and try to ease some of the pain from that experience and loss.
After chatting online for almost 3/4 year I went to Thailand I met a sweet beautiful lady that told me she had just lost her job as a manager and had no children etc. We got close and then began a relationship and to my surprise, she did have a 16 year old daughter that lived with the grandmother(she said) I forgave that lie because I understand a lady in Thailand is considered tainted merchandise is how I understood it. Anyway, I married her after a short few months of living together. Since that time I have heard so many storys and lies that she can not seem to explain except to say she couldn't speak english good to explain etc. She talked fine for all the time before, not good english but enough for us to communicate good. I came back to the US on business and she said she was staying at her parents house in Chiang mai. I sent her money for her expenses while I was gone. I found out that she actually was staying in Bkk with her daughter at her old house she had with her x. (he has a new wife living somehwere else) I knew she was in Bkk and not where she keptm telling me because I checked where she wa picking up the money,. I gave her every oportunity to tell me the truth as to where she was staying but after almost a month of asking her to tell me the truth she just would not do that. Now, of course this made my trust fly out the window and made me wonder why she would lie about that. I wouldn't have cared if she was staying there or not....But still she said she was at her parents each time I asked. When I finally told her I knew she was staying in BKK I asked why she had to lie about that. Her answer was, "I didn't think it a lie" she said she didn't want to upset me. She also had internet access the whole time but didn't send an email because that would have given it away that she was not at her parents. Well, to make a long long story shorter, I didn't return because I lost trust in my new wife at that point. I also paid 85US for a PI to check on her old job,. yep, you guessed it. They never heard of her!!...ok, now here I am with a new wife that does nothign but lie and tell me storys to get money. First there is a car payment that she needs to pay(never told me that before) and then she needed 25,000baht for insurance for her brother(who is sick)..ughh....I don't even pay that for myself let alone her brother. It was just a story to get some cash again. Then at this point I am thinking hmm Insurance..hmm would I be paying for my own insurance policy so she could gain if I suddenly had a suicide attack?....this scared me now, and I never went back for 10 months but we did talk everyday on the phone. I went back 2 weeks ago to see about maybe geting a divorce legally so I wouldn't have to worry about my demise. This does happen in Thailand more than people know and of course this made me fearfull as anyone could undestand. Anyway, I got to Bkk and she came down to meet me and brought all out clothes and everythnng. We rented a cheap condo because I had boght her a small dog before I left the first time and most hotels dont let dogs in. Anyway, she stayed on the mobile phione most of the day talkng to who knows who and she kept saying it was her father and then her daughter and then her cousin etc on and on. We hardly talled at all....now comes the good part....she tells me her brother got in trouble and stole something from his work and now her asked he to help him stay out of jail. She says she borrowed 20,000baht from a loan shark...to pay for her brother. Well, the third day we are in this condo and knock on the door at 6am....it was a kid about 18...she said it was her cousin's son and he was with a guy that she borowed the money from...now, I am fearfull at this point. I asked her how he knew what place we were staying for them to find you, and she says "im stupid: meaning she made a mistake and told the guy she owed the money to....ok, I have not idea what is really going on at this point....I pick up my laptop leaving my suitcase and everything else there and hop on am motorcylce and go find a hotel to let her sort out whatever it was. I called her and she was on her way back to her home town 6 hrs drive. and find the money or sell her car to pay this guy....now, she says she wants to come back to spend the last 10 days with me befoe I had to go back to the us for business. I am afraid now to tell her what hotel I am staying in and freaking out in my mind.
Sheould I tell her and why can she come back so fast and why did she really leave in the first place....all these questions along with her threat from one of our arguments months before saying "i die soon"...(she has a temper)
I told her I was staying at some small rooming house and wasn't sure of the name and I moved my plane ticket up for two days from then because I just wanted out of Thailand with all that secrecy stuff etc. She cried and asked me to forgive her but it was that she was so worried about this loan guy is the reason she had to return....my instincts told me to not tell her where I was staying and just get gone......I just told he that it was too hard for her to take the bus back just for 2 days together but actually I just diodn't want to take the chance of being pushed out of a balcony for insurance money....yes, I was that fearful after reading about this kind of thing happening all the time in los.....well, I even told her my flight was at 11pm rather than 6am....Iat that point I didn;t trust a thing and sure didn't want to take any chances of anything....so now I am back in the US and she is who knows the truth where....but she calls everyday and keeps that contact and of course needs money ...now I am in a big delemna as to how to get a divorce and try to trsut that she would just go easily to the amphur and sign.......sorry, for rambling this post but if anyone has any idea's or thinks I made a mistake to just split like that then please ad your opinion...
I think this loan guy was just a taxi driver to take her back to her home. He carried a clip board and held up two fingers and I guess that mean't 20,000baht....or who knows maybe it was a taxi guy that wanted 2kB for driving her back....she had told me it was the mafia people she borrrowed from ...probably thinkng I would give or pay it...I asked her how she was going to pay it and she said sell her car....I said ok, but then she said he father didn't want to sell it......now what the F.,..it was supposed to be hers/our car and our decisons on that...but she still can ride back to meet me now without paying the guy yet???????????.....it was just too crazy for me to stay and take the chance that there might be a more horrifying part to my trip......any thoughts....yes, I was stupid ok......that's a given....
But my questions are why did she tell the guy where we were staying and why did he drive all the way to bkk to get her. Isn't that kidnapping?....she took everything , bedding pillows we just bought etc....now she can ride back to be with me for the last of my trip without him beng paid??...why?....why now does he believe her that she wasn't leaving for the US,.,...was I smart to not tell her what hotel i was at until I left?...I swear it freaked me out and still today has been a week that I have been back........this woman messed my whole life up and has me in a mess.....I know I didn't have to go back to bkk but....all the phone calls and secretive stuff etc.....does anyone really think that she and a bf/husband could have been setting me up for soemthing??....that was my guy feeling because of all the crazy phone calls all day and night...
