Having a bad day...every day!

[semperfiguy]

I've been posting on this forum for nearly 10 months now since retiring to Udon last June. I generally have something negative to say about my life in Thailand, and unfortunately it's not getting any better from day to day. Some have suggested that I upgrade my lifestyle and move into a more pleasant village to get away from the discourteous neighbors, barking dogs, unkept neighborhood, etc. Well, for the first 9 months I lived in First Home Village, one of the nicer villages in Udon. Just 42 days ago I moved into Baan San Sa-Ran, Lake Garden City. I surveyed the area many times before taking the plunge, and the village had all the appearances of being a quiet, upscale and well kept community with a more affluent base of residents living in homes that cost 2 Million Baht ++. Not a day has passed that I haven't experienced an occasion when I wanted to just pull my hair out. I'm sitting here this morning, and I'm just about at my wit's end...and I need to vent...or else! I woke up this morning to the barking of my neighbor's little yapping shitzu. He's my alarm clock at 6 AM every morning. I'm made my grievances known to the owner on several occasions in a very polite and courteous manner...but to no avail. Now I've resorted to screaming out the window just after my blood pressure shoots through the roof. The neighbors could care less. The dog barks on and nobody cares but me.

Night before last the neighbor across the street threw a drinking/eating party in his front lawn and had all his relatives from the farm taking part. The music/kareoke was cranked up to an unbearable level that was vibrating the windows in my home. My lovely wife commented..."quit complaining Sweetheart, they're just celebrating Songkhran"! Well excuse me, but where does the list of entitlements to be rude to your neighbor ever end? If it's not Songkhran it's a wedding party, or a house warming, or a death anniversary or the ....the list goes on and on! After hours of endless sleep I peeped out the window and the entire crew was passed out drunk on the front lawn and every light in the house and yard was left on with the music still blaring at 180,000 decibals until the sun came up.

Beginning at 6 AM this morning the sales office from the village sponsored a Tamboon in the center of the village and invited all the residents to drop by and have the local monks throw water on them. There were about 100 locals that showed up, but the speaker's microphone and accompanying music speakers were set up as if they were playing for the Woodstock Festival. The crowd was so small they could have done it without any speakers at all, but instead they had to blast it for 4 hours so the entire east side of Udon could listen in. I wanted to venture out and take a walk around the lake to let off some steam, but the viscious looking Rottweiler and Husky that camp out at the top of the street (not street dogs...neighbors leave their gates open to let the dogs roam) make sure that I remain a prisoner in my own home.

I keep the street in front of my home clear of all debris and usually wind up policing the entire street at least once a week. The garbage truck came by this morning, and after they opened up all the plastic garbage bags and scavenged for recyclable items, I looked up and down the street and the area looked like the road going into Baghdad after the first Gulf War. Why can't Thai's take ownership for the quality of work that they perform? And guess who winds up cleaning the entire street again. How is it that Thais view litter on a street in front of their own home as "invisible" and none of their concern.

Since moving to this village I have observed that many of the residents appear to be ex farmers who have capitalized on the boost in real estate prices in and around Udon, sold out and bought a home here...or some well intentioned farang bought the home for the wife's/girlfriend's family and moved them in while they enjoy life abroad. There's not a curtain in the house, not a stick of furniture in the house and they camp out in the front yard like they're still living in the rice paddies. The front yard and driveway is littered with debris, and it looks like a tsunami just roared through the village.

Well...I could go on and on, but what good is it. You can take an ape out of the jungle, but you can't take the jungle out of the ape. It's my problem so I'll deal with it. Time for an attitude check...yep...same as it was yesterday! Change it or wind up in an early grave you say. The early grave seems like a better option at this point! Thanks for letting me vent guys.

[trubrit]

Don't really know what to say to that . It was only posted five minutes ago so just hope you've come down now .
I think most of us resident farang can understand where your coming from, we are either seeing it ourselves or certainly have seen it. Its never going to change , for the better anyway, maybe worse more likely. The trick of coping with it , as far as I'm concerned is not to see it, mentally I mean. Take the barking dogs , both the big ones and the small. Don't get annoyed just buy some of those Chinese jumping crackers, light it and sling it near them. See them move, yelping as they go, its quite fun to watch. So you have then changed a source of annoyance into amusement. Same scenario, different reaction.The loud music, well your never going to make them understand it doesn't need to be so high, so don't even try. Do as I do. Study their little faces. you will realise the constant exposure to it has killed what ever brain cells they ever had. Its amusing to see the totally blank expression they have while jigging around .Then eventually when it stops enjoy the peace. Bit like banging your head on the wall , it's a great feeling when you stop .
What I am really trying to say is , your not alone, we all get it at some time, just learn to look at it in a different manner. Believe it or not. The Thais think we are stupid for getting upset .Thinking about it, they are right really , aren't they?

[USArmy_Veteran]

Semperfiguy and trubrit have both expressed their valid concerns. I hold many of the same peeves as address above, but I guess my testosterone has abated over the years. It's much easier for me to take the baw bien yang approach now.
Trubrit is right, we can fume, complain and act out, but in the end nothing changes and after all it is their country, for better or worse. Jai yen my friends, the best we can hope for is to lead by example in the hope that it will make a difference. Every rose has it's thorns.

[monkeyman]

You have had 2 good replies already with good advise..

Make a list of the positive sides and negative sides for the reasons you are living here, if the negatives outweigh the positives you are never going to be happy living here.

If you can, try and move to a more upscale area where they have proper security, higher standards & neighbors that appreciate a higher standard of living, (not all Thais act in this way even in the villages).........Noisy Tamboons and party's are a way of life in Thailand....you can either laugh or cry.....crying and getting wound up about it will solve nothing.....try turning many of your grievances into amusement and comedy...... we all know life is too short...

[Bandung_Dero]

Interesting read to which I can hardly draw any parallels.

Our rural village of Ban Sai Mun, located some 18 Km NE of Ban Dung – 85Km from Udon, with a population of about 1350 is extremely conscious of their community spirit. With a collective effort we or should I say they, won the Tambon ‘cleanest village competition’ and was automatically entered into the Udon Province Finals. The winners were announced last week and unfortunately we were pipped on the post and finished 2nd. I was still at home during the inspections and the team of judges went into every back yard, looked into every nook and cranny so it was not just frontal appearances that counted, anyway the village was rewarded with a 700K Baht prize.

It’s not just a one of thing, our village enters every year so for the most part the place is very clean all year round, makes life much more pleasant for me.

Not with standing we still have our fare share on noisy concerts and the bloody Puyai Baan still insists on playing his crap music and doing his mail call over the tamoy at 06:30 but it’s tolerable.

[douglas]

Hi,
Complete opposite to Semp. I live in a estate in Udon. near ring road. Got the first house built, six years ago. And very happy with it. Now there are seventeen homes in the street i live in, Five owned by non Thais and twelve by Thais. The only person there is any trouble with, thinks he owns the estate and telling others what to do, is a English person. All the Thais are friendly and great to get allong with. Every one that has a , house party, wedding etc., they invite the whole street to take part. I've always enjoyed myself. Does not happen all that often.
I've got two dogs, one a half rot. and the other a Shih-tzu. The neighbours don't mind about the rot. when it barks. shih-tzu kept inside because he is blind in one eye and has a bad back. Rescued it when it was a pup. The rot only barks when a stranger goes past. Non of the houses ajacent to us have had break ins, which cannot be said of the rest of the estate. Getting more frequent lately.
And yes if the dog barks in the early hours i get up and see what is going on. And make a note of the strangers, if any, may be helpful if anyone is broken into.
Every party i've been to stops just after midnight. Most weddings, house blessings etc. take place in the mornings, and are finished before dark.
One of the parties, they closed the street and had a raised stage with dancing girls and singers. Great time had by all. They were Thais and informed the whole street by letter, and word of mouth, about the street closing.
If you require no noise, no barking dogs etc. Buy a big field out of the way of everyone, and build a house in the middle of it, with a high wall all around and barb wire, or an electric fence, on top of it.

[Stevo]

Semperfiguy.. you know me, and although I don't do sympathy (it comes between ---- & syphilis in the dictionary so don't go there )... I do understand you're frustrations.
A couple of years back I lived with my wife & child on Romyen estate (Coronation street), I hated it after a very short while so I took the plunge and moved us out to the countryside about 12 Km from the town... that was the best move I have made in years, now I live in a small 'Hamlet' with just a dozen or so houses with greenery all around us.
There are of course occasions when the locals throw a party, but the upside of this is that when I make a fair amount of noise (not just parties, but welding/grinding and other construction noises) nobody complains... it works both ways.
Although it's a bit late now in your case, I would recommend never buying until you've rented in a particular area for a full year, then if you like it... buy there.
Bottom line... get yourself out in the sticks away from the hussle. It worked for me

[Benzman2]

I live in an apartment where the rooster woke me at 04.30 or so the geese, some nights, they have red its kareoke night humm if everyone could sing like that but not the inte.Hundar are in the neighborhood but they do not bark so much, half quiet at night here.

But this is Thailand, so we have to live with it better then the coold Europa

[old-timer]

OT sleeps through most things, but from time to time when there is a soi dog on heat, the rest of the clan make a hell of a racket all day and night. i tried to shoot them with my catapult loaded with a decent stone. I tried to fire between the railings of my place. Didn't work. I hit the railing and the stone rebounded of the railing and dinked the tailgate of my pick up leaving a scratch and dent.
Some things turn out more annoying than the origonal annoyance.

OT.............

[nkstan]

I applaud your venting,IMO, very healthy.Acceptance is the key to many of the things we have no control over and ,of course,action on the things that we can change!

As it has been already suggested,there are many things that you can do.For me,I try to adapt by not having to stick to my familiar routines,but become willing to change them to deal with the disturbances.Excessive loudness,for example,especially when accompanied by aloud reverberating BASE,is the most irritating thing to me,I simply have to leave the area and find something to do,although I have fantasized about cutting speaker wires

I live in an ideal location in a very quiet small neighborhood,I rent and am quite tired of my abode,but I have stayed her for 7 years because I couldn't find anything that suited me more.But ,concerts and festivals happened a few times a year and the BASE goes BOOM BOOM and since I am retired and know that seriousness in daily affairs is no longer necessary,I simply get in the car and go somewhere else and find something to do!Since it only happens a few times a tear,no big deal!I call it,''impromptu taking a trip''!

If you want to sweep the street( I do),don't expect Thais to accept your values,do it because you want to and it is something to do!
If I remember right ,you are a religion man,so remembering your faith and practicing at those moments,might also help you!

[grozza]

semperfiguy,i know its easy for me to say but try not to stess to much we all know its know good for our blood pressure,while most of the issue you have expressed doesnt bother me to much,one thing that winds me up is the dog problem,first i cant stand them yap yap dogs they bark for nothing,and not being able to go for a walk around your village without feeling intimitdated by these dogs would upset the best of people,my advice is poison the buggers,lets face it most owners who let there dogs roam around the village wouldnt care anyway,i dont know why thai people even have dogs they dont wash them walk them patt them,they just hang around the village and breed more dogs.

[WhoUrDaddy]

semperfiguy,

Sorry to say, but you are basically screwed, royally. I've been here too long and have yet to find any area that doesn't resemble your description. So you have 2 choices, accept it, or do as I did, go out to the middle of nowhere, buy 20 rai cheap, and you will never have to deal with any of it again. I find the locals have no respect for themselves, let alone others, and are quite happy to live in sh-t and trash and pollute their senses from physical to mental abuse. I sympathize with you, and good luck.

[victor starnes]

When in Rome???, the best thing for barking dogs is FIRE WORKS or you may know them as CKACKERS. t he louder the bang the better. As for the loud music, siumply do as I did. After an all night music fest from my next door neighbour I went and hired a pick-up fully equiped with huge speakers and two night later I blew`them into ORBIT. Now at least when they have a party I get an invite. Before that I`would go and stay at RUYSUK for the night

[Jed]

Hey SFdude: Sorry to hear of your ongoing troubles; sounds like you really do need to get outta Dodge, so to speak, as a few posters have been advising you. Nice, isolated place in the country with a high wall.

High walls make good neighbors. I kept building mine higher and higher outside behind my bed, where a couple big ole fighting cocks were screaming their lungs out every morning. Of course, neighbor didn't have a clue. Then we bought a couple of the chewy foul and sacrificed them to the soup pot, which was tasty and good for a while. Til he used the money and bought more. But the wall plus double glazing brought the decibels down far enough that I wasn't shocked out of my sleep every morning. I left alarm clocks back in the states and don't need a fleshy one here that's for sure. Thais and their chickens I'll tell ya.

Along these lines with respect to sound and the everpresent noise pollution: I found the only solution that works for me is a local one -- sleep. Whenever possible. Nap. Whenever possible. Avoid sleep deficit syndrome or whatever it's called. Then when the volume ratchets up, you've got a bit of reserve; you can just get up, make a snack, read a book, watch a movie, or post here until you're good and tired and can drift off properly. The locals know. Sleep when they do and you may fare a bit better in this regard.

My 2 Baht.

[ting_tong]

shihtzu barking: ultrasonic sound that burns a dogs ears, played through a computers speakers placed by a window nearest the dog.

soi dogs: high powered sling shot or modern day blow guns, I have 1 left for sale in the classifieds, also 1 blow gun.

I do like dogs a lot if they are friendly, clean, and cared for as pets...........dirty, vicious, pooping and biting street dogs, no

SFG, when you use the M-word or other simian references, that means you have lost tolerances, time for a vacation or move. I'll look in my other HD storages for my bark stop collection

[semperfiguy]

i dont know why thai people even have dogs they dont wash them walk them patt them,they just hang around the village and breed more dogs.

Honestly, here's the deal with the dogs. The Thais actually believe that a dog in the front yard will ward off unwanted guests. Somebody in the village who didn't have a dog in the yard gets robbed, but nobody with a dog in the yard got robbed that night, so the rest of the village concludes that having a dog in the front yard must be the first line of defense against intruders...so everybody rushes out to buy a barking dog. It's that same flawed gene that hears that Mr. Somchai had a violent car crash and escaped injury because a monk had painted an order of protection on the visor above his head, so everybody rushes down to the local monk store for a visor blessing. But nobody went to the junkyard and saw the thousands of cars with visor blessings...and the owners were mangled beyond recognition. So look...the dog barks at every motorbike, and every car, and every passerby, and every other dog that happens to come within smelling range...day or night...and after awhile the owner stops paying attention when the dog barks. So when is it that he jumps out of bed at night and just automatically suspects that his dog is barking at a robber? If a thief wants to get into your home badly enough, no dog is going to keep him out. But never mind that...let's go buy a barking dog and tick off everybody in the neighborhood. After all, Thais are all non-confrontational, so nobody will mind or say anything.

But having said that, I want to thank all you guys that have commented on my post. Frankly, I didn't expect for anyone to respond...I just wanted to get some things off my chest before I exploded. But thanks to you I feel much better now and I will take all of your recommendations to heart. What I'm hearing is that I'm not the only farang who is deeply disturbed by the goings on in this environment called Thailand. Some of you have just learned to adapt better than most of us, and I applaud you for that. I'm just not there yet with the "if you can't beat them...join them" mentality. And besides...if I did that, what would I have to complain about? It's my bent in life and partly defines who I am. I can look into a plan and tell you where it will fail. I can look into a failing business and tell you the reasons for failure. I can interview the participants in a relationship that's coming unglued and tell them why it's falling apart. But more importantly I can usually give solutions for all of the problems. But for some reason I can't seem to follow my own advise for changing my attitude towards the Thai mentality. Maybe I'm caught up in a time warp and should have been born during the era when the white man was exterminating the American Indian population because they didn't think and act like the white man. Just a thought!

Well, the sun is setting on another glorious day in the LOS. Now that's a new twist...a positive mental attitude. Let's see... how does that go? Oh yea...suggestions to the sub-conscious mind are transformed into a physical equivalency. Got it...can't wait to hear the neighbor's barking dog tomorrow morning at 6 AM! Thank God I don't have to buy an alarm clock!

[bumper]

Well Coach you can't make it in first homes, only thing left a good hermit cave might do it. Don't get close to a Wat though.

I have to admit I'm working on ten years now, over the last few months for whatever reason I began to wonder if I made mistake. I'm invested here, you know I think about three years out it all stopped being cute. Even got down to some serious road rage during this holiday. My wife was pleading with the jerk to forgive me in Thai. I just wanted to C clamp the ***** and choke him out. I really don't like pretending rude behavior of others is OK on the road. I think part of the problem is I don't live in fear now. I know I will pay a fine and feel much better for it when it's over.

Now guys that is not how I m normally feel so something is up. Unlike you can't list as you do, you seem to have a very clear understanding. So that is one place we differ. Where else do we differ you don't own a home and all the trappings one great fire sale and airline tickets your out of here.

I reading over what you wrote pretty damn accurate of life here. You know I. liked it enough to stay ten years and you see how I'm feeling. So what is you ten years going to be like.

You know whats stops me from leaving, at one time Thailand had magic for me. I've lost it I have to find it again or I'm in deep trouble. In the ten years I have been here I created more wealth not working then I did working my entire life in the States. What would I have there if i went back all my friends still have to work they have no time and the same for my children.

Coach we are the same you can't find the magic. no reason to be here. I will find mine again, doesn't sound real promising for you. Still homes for rent here and we pay a guy to keep the streets clean only difference I can think of.

[roberto0268]

Do as I do!
My wife tells me that at 4.30 the cocks wake her up (she wakes up at 5 am anyway). We live 100 yards from the village market and (she tells me) there is tuk tuk and truck traffic starting 2 am. I would not know about that, as I go to sleep at around midnight or 1 am, after 3 Chiangs one sleeping pill, put on the AC and insert ear plugs. Try this version!!!
Good luck

[jimboLV]

To Semperfi and bunper. Check the Internet. There are planes leaving EVERY DAY! That will sove your problem.

[rct]

Standard of living, quality of life, sensory perceptions, definitions include many elements that are subjective.

In my eyes Thailand lags in many areas, my summation after 17 years based here. I am still working with frequent travel abroad, this is a base, and I dare say Thailand is and probably always will be the best Asian country for nice living. Though does not stack up well against life back in the US, or in Europe where I spent a few years, in my view.

Paradise, meaning the attraction to live in Thailand, for some may be low costs: for labor, eating and drinking beer out, bountiful women, ability to get into a relatively inexpensive (concrete box of a) home without annual property taxes etc.

Though when it comes to general lifestyles in, not to mention appearance of, Thai cities and neighborhoods, the quality and cost ratio of homes falls way short compared to the West. What things "end up" looking like, and living like, inside the majority of Thai housing estates even those where homes may cost 5-7 million baht, I do not find Thailand to be great value. So depends on what one wants to surround oneself with and is willing to pay for.

Of course if one has means, then can create and maintain a palace for far less cost than in most western countries. I happen to live in such a place, I paid dearly for it, and did it so as to avoid the trap that Semperfly is now in. On balance however the grass seems greener back home.