I was thinking

Post by **jackspratt** » March 1, 2013, 2:12 pm

o-t, I am sure your s3xual fantasies will find a limited audience on this forum.

Post by **parrot** » March 1, 2013, 4:28 pm

When the topic is enemas or detox or colon cleansing or 'depends' for that matter, I usually try to fixate on something else.........like having a big bowl of spicy hot Vietnamese noodle soup with loads of veggies along with a cooling glass of ice-tea. That's spells r-e-l-i-e-f for me.

Post by **pompui** » March 29, 2013, 3:33 am

Are there any restrictions as to the type of bicycle that can be used to go around Nong Prajack Lake

,an electric bycycle could be potentially dangerous with speed and causing accidents through lack of vision,otherwise if ok, are there accessible electric points to connect up to.

Maybe have to get down there and see if warning signs are evident $\:D/$

Post by **harmonyudon** » March 31, 2013, 1:13 am

A lot of topics about immigration nowadays.

I am now wondering what the young immigration officer once at Schiphol Airport thought when he asked me the question "how long have you been living in NL?" which I replied in the style of some of my postings: "longer than you, you little weezle....." $\:D/$ $\:D/$

Post by **old-timer** » May 27, 2013, 11:04 pm

It's unlikely you will hear OT bragging about much, however since I wrote off my V8 Hemi Dodge Charger and replaced it with a V8 BMW X5 Sports, got a pay rise equal to a UK pension back dated to January, and the wife and youngest have gone back to Udon after spending my monthly salary together with my backdated pay rise, OT is off to the Philippines next month on ten days R&R.

OT.......... $\:D/$

Post by **fatbob** » May 28, 2013, 7:17 am

I would love to know what drugs your on, they are good. Old 'Skyhooks' song 'Ego is not a dirty word'. OT must have to many mirrors in his house.

Post by **tamada** » May 29, 2013, 11:20 am

Funny old day yesterday; around 4PM I was thinking somewhere to eat, have a cold beer and a stogie so headed to Bubba's... not open (get well soon mate; sorry about your head). So decided to pop out to Papa Farang's and take up Dean on the offer to park my arse and have a beer... then the thunderstorm blew through and the tables and chairs were already inside at PF's. Bugger! I will pop out and see Chris then... nope. Shutters open... but only a couple of inches. Hmmmm. I guess I will slum it on the front stoop at Irish Clock instead. WTF???!!! It's 5PM on a Tuesday so what's with all these guys occupying all the tables out front???!!! It was totally dead a few days ago. I already ate this week at the Pattaya place (gets my coldest beer in Udon award btw) and it's way too early for Sister's 2 (and their excellent kitchen won't be open either) so.... wait... look at the legs on that honey at the Viking bar on the corner of Sampan. OMG, those shorts are so.... SHORT!!!

Four bottles of Tiger later.... (and no, it wasn't the LB that works there either) she tells me she's eighteen and never been....

Post by **old-timer** » June 8, 2013, 3:54 am

Multitasking. OT's not talking about patting your head and rubbing your stomach, I'm talking about texting / sending SMS whilst driving. What nutter said that talking on the phone was illegal whilst driving, now everyone sends a message instead which I must admit is far more tricky than just answering the phone, at least when the phone rings you can keep your eyes on the road after you've checked out who's calling and answered or silenced.

OT.............. $\:D/$

Post by **old-timer** » June 8, 2013, 11:39 am

OT got off the plane yesterday and some bright spark customs officer asked me how much money I had on me. I said 94,000 PHP, that was all they had at the bank so I was unable to bring any more, should do for a weeks spending money on holiday. Well, from that moment on he told me I was going to prison and my PHP would be confiscated. OT thought this was a bit harsh and wondered what the taxi from the hotel waiting to pick me up would do when I fail to meet him.
I then went on to ask him why I was going to be broke in prison. What had happened was I signed a declaration saying I had less than 10,000 PHP on me. I thought it said a realistic 10,000 USD and ticked the wrong box. In mitigation I explained to Boss customs man, who was now called in, that I had drank at least 2 bottles of champagne on the flight and didn't care much about any declaration seeing as I thought I had done nothing wrong.
OT has watched a Aussie series called border patrol, and they will not let you in the country if you don't have enough money, it's the same as the UK.
Anyway, OT bunged the smiling customs officers 5k and was on his way. By that time my taxi had Fcuked off.

OT................ $\:D/$

Post by **semperfiguy** » June 8, 2013, 1:20 pm

old-timer wrote:OT got off the plane yesterday and some bright spark customs officer asked me how much money I had on me. I said 94,000 PHP, that was all they had at the bank so I was unable to bring any more, should do for a weeks spending money on holiday. Well, from that moment on he told me I was going to prison and my PHP would be confiscated. OT thought this was a bit harsh and wondered what the taxi from the hotel waiting to pick me up would do when I fail to meet him.
I then went on to ask him why I was going to be broke in prison. What had happened was I signed a declaration saying I had less than 10,000 PHP on me. I thought it said a realistic 10,000 USD and ticked the wrong box. In mitigation I explained to Boss customs man, who was now called in, that I had drank at least 2 bottles of champagne on the flight and didn't care much about any declaration seeing as I thought I had done nothing wrong.
OT has watched a Aussie series called border patrol, and they will not let you in the country if you don't have enough money, it's the same as the UK.
Anyway, OT bunged the smiling customs officers 5k and was on his way. By that time my taxi had Fcuked off.

OT................ $\:D/$

You did the right thing OT! When you were pulled to the side it was never about catching you in your wrongdoing anyway. These guys look for these glitches like this because it gives them an opportunity to scam a guy out of his money. Frickin' scoundrels!

Post by **old-timer** » September 22, 2013, 2:14 pm

Just done a few grand on WFBs and lager in Angeles again. OT wasted the money after that.

OT......... $\:D/$

Post by **fatbob** » September 22, 2013, 7:30 pm

Sounds like you have only just discovered the Phillys.

Post by **BigBubba** » September 24, 2013, 5:31 pm

old-timer wrote:Just done a few grand on WFBs and lager in Angeles again. OT wasted the money after that.

OT......... $\:D/$

Reminds me of W.C. Fields answer when someone asked what he did with his money. He replied, "Half went for gambling, drinking, and loose women... the other half I wasted."

Post by **747man** » September 24, 2013, 5:54 pm

old-timer wrote:OT got off the plane yesterday and some bright spark customs officer asked me how much money I had on me. I said 94,000 PHP, that was all they had at the bank so I was unable to bring any more, should do for a weeks spending money on holiday. Well, from that moment on he told me I was going to prison and my PHP would be confiscated. OT thought this was a bit harsh and wondered what the taxi from the hotel waiting to pick me up would do when I fail to meet him.
I then went on to ask him why I was going to be broke in prison. What had happened was I signed a declaration saying I had less than 10,000 PHP on me. I thought it said a realistic 10,000 USD and ticked the wrong box. In mitigation I explained to Boss customs man, who was now called in, that I had drank at least 2 bottles of champagne on the flight and didn't care much about any declaration seeing as I thought I had done nothing wrong.
OT has watched a Aussie series called border patrol, and they will not let you in the country if you don't have enough money, it's the same as the UK.
Anyway, OT bunged the smiling customs officers 5k and was on his way. By that time my taxi had Fcuked off.

OT................ $\:D/$

Ha ! Champagne on a CHARTER / LOW COST Flight......Pull the other one.....

Post by **747man** » September 24, 2013, 5:55 pm

BigBubba wrote:
old-timer wrote:Just done a few grand on WFBs and lager in Angeles again. OT wasted the money after that.

OT......... $\:D/$
Reminds me of W.C. Fields answer when someone asked what he did with his money. He replied, "Half went for gambling, drinking, and loose women... the other half I wasted."

That's where he got it from Bubba !!

Post by **747man** » September 24, 2013, 5:59 pm

Anyway, OT bunged the smiling customs officers 5k and was on his way. By that time my taxi had Fcuked off.

You are BAD Old Timer trying to corrupt those Officials

Then Did you jump a Cheap Charlie Jeepney..

Post by **stattointhailand** » February 8, 2014, 1:59 pm

given the world is now a "global market" and that people everywhere seem to want to eat food from all over the place, why can't the powers that be get their act together when dealing with recepies and measurements

Just purchased a cake mix in a packet (so cheap it was a better option than buying the flour etc myself), and looked on the packet .....

1 1/4 cups of water ........ that's easy my measure jug has a line showing 1 cup, 1/2 cup etc

problem, it was purchased in Thailand, so I presume it is Japanese standard cup which is 200ml NOT the usual 250 ml, so I still have to measure it in ml or be 62ml short

so that's 250ml + 62ml = 312ml .......

hang on where does this pack come from ...... oh strewth it from US, so does that mean that a "cup" is 236.5882365 ml standard measure in US or "legal" measure in US 240 ml?

Think I'll go back to my old fruit cake recepie that me mum gave me 40 years ago

Post by **stattointhailand** » May 15, 2014, 3:01 pm

I was just thinking, I will have to have a serious word with my wife.
Not sure if she has changed the washing powder or the way she washes my clothes, but they have all suddenly started to shrink over the last month or two

Post by **parrot** » May 15, 2014, 3:45 pm

stattointhailand wrote:I was just thinking, I will have to have a serious word with my wife.
Not sure if she has changed the washing powder or the way she washes my clothes, but they have all suddenly started to shrink over the last month or two

This is the time of the year when my clothes 'stink'....as in stink real bad. 2-3 showers a day doesn't help much.

Post by **stattointhailand** » May 15, 2014, 4:05 pm

Have to pay extra care to your tail feathers parrot