Are Thai women all the same

carpy · Post by **carpy** » August 14, 2007, 10:02 pm

I have been married 2 times to a Thai lady.And have found them to be fine untill they have a child.Both times have had a child and they have changed within 3 months of the child being born.I would like to know if anyone has experienced the same.

Post by **Frankie 1** » August 14, 2007, 10:06 pm

In what way did they change?

Post by **beer monkey** » August 14, 2007, 10:10 pm

do you mean more mental than they was before or the other way round. ?

disclaimer : i mean it in a nice light-hearted way, before anyone has a go about the use of the term "mental" .

carpy · Post by **carpy** » August 14, 2007, 10:18 pm

They seem to think that they can control you.Like they tend to us the child against you to get what they want.

Post by **beer monkey** » August 14, 2007, 10:21 pm

ahhh yes ....... can be like that at times, but i figure thats all women.

carpy · Post by **carpy** » August 14, 2007, 11:49 pm

I have been told that a isarn lady 25 years old has the mentality of a 15 year old.They lack comen sence.After 15 years of Thai women i think they are all very stupid people.And are un change able.

Post by **Frankie 1** » August 15, 2007, 12:57 am

I don't agree.

Women are testing men all the time. They challenge you to take charge of the situation.
If you don't, and you let them take control, then they will see you as a wuss and walk all over you, start to cheat on you etc.

It's just like classical dancing. The man leads.
If the man lets the woman lead, then he starts to get problems.

I think that Isan women are more intelligent than they let you believe.

Post by **pompui** » August 15, 2007, 2:09 am

And there was me thinking that they will bear a child to a farang only to secure your pension once you have died but in the meantime they need to drain your longtime savings.
Maybe it is just the catholic thing not take precautions or were you both as fully committed to bringing a child into this world.

Post by **Frankie 1** » August 15, 2007, 3:34 am

In the past I have seen some men change after their child was born.
Suddenly they were not the most important person in the relationship anymore, they became jealous of the child, because the child got all the attention.
They started to act differently.

Post by **BKKSTAN** » August 15, 2007, 3:37 am

I believe that there are many that once they have the child or the house,they feel empowered because their security needs have been addressed!Therefore they assert themselves more.I am not saying this is good or bad,but depends on the relationship,how it plays out!
IMO,90% of the relationships between the falang and his Thai partner are based on security needs of the Thai woman!If she has grown to love you or if she has the character to want to fulfill her commitment to you,you will work it out as partners!

Otherwise,it is the beginning of the end!Your power over her has been diminished and she has many more options!If your relationship has not grown in mutual respect and understanding,she may want to use whats left of her youth to find a richer or more compatible partner!

So if you treat your gal as a servant,sex slave etc. because you have the money,there is a good chance that now she will start acting out!

efxg57 · Post by **efxg57** » August 15, 2007, 4:37 am

hey carpy, well i can't speak from experience, but i can speak on how i see my friends relationship. i have one set of friends, been married for several years and have one beautiful child. i must admit i have never seen two people happier in their marriage. they share everything and are extremely happy and never seem to have any problems. i know that there are always expections to the rule, but i can't imagine them ever fighting nor her trying to put pressure on him for anything. now, on the other hand, i have other friends that since their child was born it has been one fight after another. i am not sure who is to blame, but it takes two to tango and two to fight. i have been told the same as you that the Issen girls only want your money and then child for pension, not sure about that. i myself am happily married, with the same bumps and turmoil as most, but believe me, WOULD NOT HAVE IT ANY OTHER WAY

. if you get a good one, then you are set for life, choose poorly, and then life can take on a whole new meaning of pain and discomfort. best of luck !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Post by **Ricohoc** » August 15, 2007, 7:44 am

Women are the same everywhere in the world. It's still important to find a "good one" in Thailand.

Post by **RALPHCUSENS** » August 15, 2007, 10:50 am

carpy wrote:I have been told that a isarn lady 25 years old has the mentality of a 15 year old.They lack comen sence.After 15 years of Thai women i think they are all very stupid people.And are un change able.

I am sorry carpy, I have to disagree with you, to classify "All Thai women as very stupid people" , is to say the least very, demeaning, yes, there are, as you put it, some stupid Thai women, as there is with any other race, but there is also some very intelligent and highly educated Thai women.

Just because, some ladies are less educated, does not mean that they are stupid.

The vast majority of Expats I have had the pleasue of meeting since settling in Udon, have settled down with Thai women that are charming, good conversationalists,and certainly NOT STUPID!.

Why don't you come along to one of the Forum get to-gethers on the first saturday of any month, and meet some of the many NON STUPID LADIES, that some of us have been lucky enough to have met.

Post by **Irish Alan** » August 15, 2007, 11:07 am

Well said Ralph... If anything is stupid it is generalisations about ANY nationality or race.

Post by **ronan01** » August 17, 2007, 1:05 pm

I had a girlfriend from Nhong Kai for many years. The relationship "ended", but fortunately we remained very good friends. She is now in London and I am in Perth, WA, but we are in regular contact. I suspect we will end up together in Udon one day in the future.

I ended the relationship because she wanted chilren and I did not (I feel too old for any more kids). I was not prepared to maintain a relationship whereby she would remain childless - I thought this would become an issue eventually.

In any case, I found this woman to be lovely, but very immature, as I find many Thai women. I would class her as a "simple farm girl", but not simple minded, just very uncomplicated and with little formal education.

But she had a mind that was sharp as a razor, and could pick up and develop complex issues, if given information and time. I think it a great mistake to classify Issan women as stupid. I think they are simply lacking education and their world view reflects this.

It is the "uncomplcated" manner that I love, but I found that "educating" a Thai woman enhanced the realtionship.

In many cases I have found that an Issan womans intuitive grasp of a situation is superior to my intellectual understanding.

They "feel", we "think".

Post by **BKKSTAN** » August 17, 2007, 1:11 pm

Well said ronan01 =D> =D>

Post by **The man from Ketchup** » August 17, 2007, 3:22 pm

Well put Ronan,

My GF is very smart. Quite often tries not to show it. (Do not know why!).

She says her English is bad and gets me to tell her what a letter/email says. To my mistake I skimmed over it, telling what I thought were the important parts.

Only to be question later on why I did not tell her about a certain paragraph.

A lesson quickly learnt, of not to try and hide things from her and that she knows more English than I gave credit for, spoken and written (me Bad).

Also when I meet the family and I mean all the family. I soon found that the women run this family. Grand-mama is the true Matriarch. Which I do not mind, she is a very loving and caring person who only wants the best for her family. Which I think, when I have joined the family that will include me. "Especially if I help in the production of Grand children.

"

So the thai girls I know have the brains. My future Grand-papa has good smarts but I have not meet too many overly smart Thai men in my travels.

Maybe they are better at hiding it than the women. But I suspect not!!!

Post by **izzix** » August 17, 2007, 11:03 pm

[quote="RALPHCUSENS"][quote="carpy"]I have been told that a isarn lady 25 years old has the mentality of a 15 year old.They lack comen sence.After 15 years of Thai women i think they are all very stupid people.And are un change able.[/quote]

I am sorry carpy, I have to disagree with you, to classify "All Thai women as very stupid people" , is to say the least very, demeaning, yes, there are, as you put it, some stupid Thai women, as there is with any other race, but there is also some very intelligent and highly educated Thai women.

Just because, some ladies are less educated, does not mean that they are stupid.

The vast majority of Expats I have had the pleasue of meeting since settling in Udon, have settled down with Thai women that are charming, good conversationalists,and certainly NOT STUPID!.

Why don't you come along to one of the Forum get to-gethers on the first saturday of any month, and meet some of the many NON STUPID LADIES, that some of us have been lucky enough to have met.

:D[/quote]

they are not all dumb ,but more than a few are the equivalent of the english chav girls . comparable with chavs on a Glasgow housing estate for example .

Post by **BAGPUS.LWE** » August 17, 2007, 11:39 pm

I am married to a thai lady. she is lovely, intelligent and has a good job here in the UK and I am very happy with the decision I made to marry her.

However, most of the Thai ladies we have met here appear to be nice but you soon realise that they do indeed lack common sense are are somewhat stupid. This I believe comes from the fact that alot are not educated many have left school at a very early age. In addition many are jealous, cause trouble and are in competition with each other - a very 'bar' girl type mentality. At present we have only met a very few Thai ladies here that can be trusted - and you guessed it, they are educated have never worked in a bar and have integrated well in the UK !

My wife actually perfers contact with my English friends at least they can hold a decent conversation without the nonsense!

Post by **izzix** » August 18, 2007, 1:44 am

i suppose 'simpletons' might classify them more accurately .
i would say 90% that i have seen, known or heard about in the UK are dumbos of the 1st degree .i could tell you some stories that would seriously alarm you all but ....