A dilemma - of sorts!

Post by **zoomzoom** » April 30, 2008, 4:47 am

I would appreciate the feedback, of board members, to this situation.

About 6/7 months ago I had occasion to object to another Englishman's behaviour in Udon.

This guy (no names, no pack drill) is someone who is renowned for believing that because he spends money like water that he can treat Thai women/Thai people with no respect, at all.

Indeed, 2 bar owners have told me that that that would bar him if he did not spend so much (can be 30/40K Bhat per week).

He argues in bars and treats all Thai women like ****.

Ever since, though, after he "groped" my g/f, who is a respectable Thai lady, and I then insisted that he apologise (publicly) he has had a problem with me, as you might expect (given that I caused him to lose face).

Anyway, last Saturday night, after spending a very pleasant evening, in the Irish Clock, I was walking back towards 7/11 and passed Richmonds.

Seeing a number of people that I know, sitting outside, I stopped and was invited to sit down.

I shook hands with all of the males and then received a, totally unexpected, punch, in the eye, from the guy I have referred to.

My, immediate, response (without thinking) was to hit him back.

No more, no less - the fact, though, that I am 60 years old, next month and I think he is about 10 years younger made no difference to that.

That, I think, was the same as any other guy would have done.

He, though, received more damage than I had - I had minimal damage to my eye - he had a blood soaked shirt.

However, what happened next, though, was (IMHO) ridiculous.

My g/f convinced me that I should walk away - I must say against my better judgement, because my first reaction was just to sit down again and ignore what had happened.

Maybe, though, because I had damaged him, far more, that he had damaged me, (1 punch for 1 punch, but he had blood everywhere), after walking about 200 metres down the road, I became aware of him chasing after me and shouting, continual threats.

Not unnaturally I stopped and was prepared to meet his challenge.

However, then the police arrived (at his request) and he then insissted that he had not laid a finger upon me, which was subsequently dis-proven by hospital examination which showed "soft tissue" eye damage, but he ranted and raved that I should be "thrown into prison" then deported from Thailand.

This resulted in a one hour visit to the U/T Police Station where, I must say that I was treated with utmost respect and left before he did.

However, what do people think that I should do now?

I do not mean should I pursue him but how should I handle the situation in future?

This is a guy who, constantly, brags about how much money he has - e.g. spending 300,000 Bhat on his kitchen.

The guy, though, is a first class prat and if he challenges me "face to face" (as I think he, probably will) I would like nothing more than to "knock his lights out".

However, I do not think that would be a sensible option.

Advice please!

Post by **pompui** » April 30, 2008, 5:47 am

What happened to all the witnesses to the first commotion? or are they friends of you both?
Is this bloke known to the Tourist Police as they are aware and know the names of known farang troublemakers in udon and were the Tourist police first on the scene?
You should not be worried at all as you appear to have many witnesses and if they are friends of the ***** then they must all be embarassed like hell,probably would have made the ***** look worse by you not reacting back.And just think if you had called the tourist police and had all the witnesses with you down at the police station then the ***** would not be so confident next time in any situation.
Does the ***** even recall groping your g/f 6/7 mths ago,know doubt he just thought she was another b/g that has to accept unwanted attention from a *****.

Post by **Robtaff** » April 30, 2008, 7:07 am

The guy sounds like a right clown.

It is probably best to not drink at the same places that are his main watering holes as he may have hangers on who just drink with him cos he has spare 'flash' cash but might take his side in an future altercation. (as witnesses or more)

Post by **Amida** » April 30, 2008, 7:08 am

Honestly, I probably don't know either of you, but as the misses likes to go out sometimes with her friends, she gets harassed sometimes as well by types who think all women are bar girls.

However she is a smart and educated woman who can deal with this pricks very well. As for your situation, I do not believe in a eye-for-an-eye handling of conflicts.

As Pompui said, he would be more embarrassed if you just ignored him, as nothing happened with you. Regardless who is to blame, being questioned at a police station leaves marks behind and does not benefit you at all, where to fight are two to blame. Me? I would walk away from this all and ignore whatever follows.

Keep the honor to yourself and don't get involved in Thai-style conflict solutions which at the end only makes you look like an idiot.

Post by **papaguido** » April 30, 2008, 7:11 am

Boy that's a tough one. It doesn't sound like this guy is willing to give up too easily. As you say, he has money to burn, so who knows how far this guy will take it. You run the risk of this guy setting you up either with the cops or some local thugs. May be it's time for a holiday until things cool off.

...or go to the Tourist Police, report the incident. After all there were witnesses right. Not sure how successful you'll will be with this option.

...or fight fire with fire and I'll leave that up to your imagination.

Post by **saint** » April 30, 2008, 7:50 am

if this guy is as much of an arsehole as he sounds, my guess is hes known by the police, even they dont like thai people being treated like sh~t. as i see it you have 2 options. the first and in my opnion the best option is to ignore him in future , try to avoid the places he uses and in time he will pick on the wrong person and the police will sort him one way or another. the other is to fight fire with fire without personal involvement, theres plenty of fit thai guys who would not turn down a few baht , especially if they know his pockets are full.

Post by **aznyron** » April 30, 2008, 8:34 am

the day he touched my wife would be his last day I would fu/ck him up so bad his mother would not recognize him as for the police they don't scare me with deportation. and now that I am recovering from a bad motorcycle accident I would bust his fuc/individual head in with a brick or a stick any thing I could find
maybe if some one did that to him and send him a message he just might be more respectful or leave thailand

Post by **Jamesb** » April 30, 2008, 9:34 am

What did the idiot look like? I know one guy around town that fits your description. He has bags of money, throws 1,000 baht tips to all the girls, always brags about how much money he has. The bar owners put up with him because he spends so much.
I've got no time for the rich (silverspoon) guys who look down on people less fortunate.

Post by **Mr Natural** » April 30, 2008, 10:17 am

People like this should be chastise from the falang community. Thais judge all of us by the actions of the worst of us. Most falang bar and restaurant owners I know would not allow someone who behaved like this in there establishment no matter how much money they were spending. If the owner does allow this, then it should be made known to the rest of us so we can avoid patronizing establishments that encourage this type of nonsense.

Post by **wizard** » April 30, 2008, 10:52 am

I go along the lines of Mr Natural. You appear that you cannot get into much more ---- than what you are now and deeply concerned with this situation otherwise you would not be asking strangers for help. I would be naming him and the bars he attends. What is he going to do if you name him, sue you for slander.....in Thailand, I think not. Then with the naming of his frequent bars, you people up Udon way might look at another venue, hoping the pressure of your non-attendance will hit home with that particular bar owner and force the owner to eject him.

Post by **BobHelm** » April 30, 2008, 11:09 am

saint wrote: is to ignore him in future , try to avoid the places he uses and in time he will pick on the wrong person and the police will sort him one way or another

IMO you will not receive better advice than this.

Post by **wizard** » April 30, 2008, 11:46 am

Try to ignore him and avoid the places he goes. So what are you going to do, look over your shoulder all the time, or if you see him in a bar you like you do not enter, or if you hear he could be in a bar you take a wide berth, nah chicken s.it.

Post by **BKKSTAN** » April 30, 2008, 12:10 pm

Well,walking away,reporting him to the police,naming his wateringholes and him are all sound advice!!!

The problem is it is not easy for some to do!

Myself,After a couple of close call s with Thais early on while I was less established in Thailand,I am able to walk away from Thai situations and avoid confrontation as the consequences are more than I am willing for my family to risk!

But with falangs ,I still put myself in jeopardy for serious damage to occur!I have had 4 fights in Thailand with falangs.I never seek to fight and I am not the most skilled,at 69,I have never backed down since I was in the 4 th grade,was acting cowardly and finally was forced into a situation to conquer my fears!I learned that boxing is not fighting,kicking ass with whatever it takes to win has been with me since the 4 th grade and it has always been successful,but dangerous!

I would personally do my absolute best to avoid this ***** to avoid causing him injury and me some possible problems!

If I was single,I would seek him out and wipe his ass on the pavement!

Post by **POB** » April 30, 2008, 12:36 pm

In all walks of life you meet a*se holes who spoil the relationship we have local people not just here in Thailand but all over the world. The one thing I have learned is to walk away not easy to do but it does make you a better man and you will earn far more respect from your peers and even support from doing this option. I am moving to Udon on the 5th of May don't know anyone from Udon apart from my GF and certainly wouldnt want to meet this guy. I agree with previous thread of name and shame. He may love to flash the cash but without friends and family he has nothing and never will. Sounds like he should be deported back to Pattaya or further afield. With regards to avoiding him don't you have done nothing wrong from reading your story above so why should you hide just ensure if you do see him have witnesses.

Post by **saint** » April 30, 2008, 12:47 pm

zoom, i also think that you should name the pr~ck, this is not pattaya its, a family based farang community here, we niether need or want d~ckheads like that in this town, if hes known publically and enough of us shun him , he will get the message and crawl back under whichever stone the lowlife came from.

Post by **pompui** » April 30, 2008, 1:21 pm

Naming and shaming is probably not going to be tolerated by the moderators but there is enough info already,50 yrs old approx,has a 300k baht kitchen,throws 1000 bahts around like confetti,manhandles bargirls at every opportunity and is known by 2 bar owners,probably soi sauce otherwise plenty of forumites here who had frequented up2u and aussie would have recognised this *****.
The bar owners of course welcome stacks of cash,helps their cashflow but turn a blind eye to cheap charlies like myself (OOPS),cheapish charlies, who want to feel welcomed in a bar without having to drink a beer next to a *****.
Presumably zoom we will not be seeing you both on home 3 cable tonight at 6pm

Post by **wizard** » April 30, 2008, 1:41 pm

Sniff sniff, I am starting to smell a rat winding up.

Post by **treehugger** » April 30, 2008, 1:48 pm

I believe that it was Groucho Marx who said

Post by **BKKSTAN** » April 30, 2008, 2:24 pm

There were 2 characters in NK that were having the same attitude peoblems when enibriated!
Both got the same treatment from the police.They wound up in a field around 1-2am with the ---- kicked out of them though no broken bones,no threats,no publicity!

One was an ex cop and a big spender,he had it happen twice.I have not seen him for a couple of years!

The other one is still around,but you see him sitting alone drinking his beer and doing crosswords,no more drunken obnoxious behavior or mouthing off as he did in the past!

Neither one of these guys was ever known to grope or bother women though!

Post by **Darryl** » April 30, 2008, 2:40 pm

yeah ,whats his name?